Creepy TSA Lady Tries to Steal Liquids Ziploc!

Oh the terror, oh the humanity... oh the sleepless nights...

So I woke up yesterday morning around... well... I'm not entirely sure... the time distortion has begun. I think it was around 9:30, which is late for me recently. For some odd reason (possibly the whole quitting smoking and running business) my internal clock has finally set itself of late. Good news in some ways, terrible news in others. The realization that I did, in fact, have a functioning inner clock led me to the wild and reckless decision of last evening–inspired by Molly Carew-to avoid jetlag and the tedium of a fifteen hour flight by staying awake until it. All considered, it will probably work out for the best. I got a lot accomplished last night and the only thing I think i forgot was my baseball hat, which I probably didn't need anyway.

One side effect of sleep withdrawal is rambling, which will commence now. As i have nothing to report as yet... since I'm only in Hotlanta on layover... I will discuss with you the quantum mechanics and metaphysics involved in packing one's entire life (for a year, mind you) into a suitcase or two. I think in my mind I had stolen Mary Poppins' purse as a carry on. I kept mentally putting things into my bag and assuming that they'd just slip into the corner of my bag, making room for the next twelve things. It's pretty comical, really. If you've read the latest Harry Potter book, you know why I wish I had Hermione around to make me a little bag that can hold tents and picture frames, but still fits nicely into a pocket.

In all, I brought:

Black shoes
Brown shoes
Running shoes
A few comic books to teach with
Two pairs of running shorts
Three pairs of outing shorts
Four pairs of jeans
Five pant-shirt-tie pairings
but sadly, Six-by-Seuss didn't make the final cut, just Cat in a Hat, Cat in a Hat Comes Back, and of course Green Eggs and Ham

Ok, I could keep listing, but the real highlights are the four packets of taco seasoning and the five boxes of fruit snacks (one of which I now carry in my stomach)... which are utterly ludicrous.... and of course the protein bars I brought because I had an irrational fear of being too exhausted to venture out and try to figure out how to eat... I also brought enough audiobooks to keep me occupied for a solid week, though I can't think of the last time I listened to one while doing anything but driving.... ha... we'll see how that works out...

So I was up all night, trying to decide what I could live without, and, faced with two conflicting answers ("all of it" and "none of it"), I wound up reformatting my iMac so my dad can take it to his office and then going for the most amazing run of my life down Cranston at 3 30 in the morning. I think there's something about being around my house at night that is pretty magical and significant for me. It sounds funny, twisted, and offensive, but I feel like my family is more my own when they're all asleep and I get to skulk around and accomplish things silently. The run was just icing on the cake. I haven't gotten to run for the past few days because I've not been feeling so hot, and to get to run out in the middle of nowhere with no cars on the road and the full moon streaming through the low, dense fog was amazing. I have no idea how far I went, but by the time I got back I had pushed through exhaustion into delirium... and with delirium came the peace I'd been waiting to feel about this trip...

I got back, showered, packed the last of my stuff, weighed myself alone and with my bags again (it was pretty entertaining) so that I could see if everything fit, and it was time to go.

Mom and Dad drove me to the airport and we listened to the LIfe of Pi, which is a great book. I dozed off a few times, and got that sick gut feeling at the airport as I said good bye and then stood awkwardly waiting in line waving. Goodbyes are easier when they're clean and quick, but I'm not complaining. I have some pretty amazing parents, and they're backing me on my craziest venture yet.

Ok. I totally forgot to build to this... I'll have to remember that next time... but in comes the crazy TSA lady and the random screening. Actually, she was pretty nice and this is more of an anticlimax than a climax, except that she gave me a look like I was about to bomb a plane when i went up to her and asked if I could have my ziploc o' liquids, which she hadn't returned to me after I was frisked and my belongings were treated like nothing should ever be treated.

So I got on the plane, tried to listen to an audiobook and maybe sleep a little.... none of which worked because I'm delirious and I wouldn't even be able to tell if they did... and wound up talking to a nice woman who I think wanted to talk the whole time but I can't really be sure.

And now I'm in Hotlanta, feeling much better about life since Laura, who teaches at the school, emailed me back and said that they're going to meet me tonight (though tonight is really tomorrow night which is half as far away or something like that), and meeting them is a huge relief, because it means I can ask them how to find food and won't have to raid my protein bars immediately. She also gave me the go ahead to get a bottle of Maker's for the school director, which I got at duty free after dodging the very appealing and cheap box of Lucky Strike Lights.

And now I sit here, having decided to get Panda Express for lunch/breakfast because I love irony. It's pretty gross, but I had to have cheap, imitation, americanized Asian cuisine one last time. Really, I'm just playing games with myself. I'm not too concerned about anything right now, and as I said, I like quick, clean goodbyes. So I'm ready for my close up, Mr. Deville. Or something like that. Let's get this show on the road.

I miss you all already, but life goes on and gets more wonderful and exciting... We've got to keep meeting new people to miss later....

Here goes nothing

Joe